I can't help but Wonder


Disclaimer: This post is, in any way, not a promotion of the entity/ies that will be mentioned.

Just recently I ventured into one of my favourite hobbies: watching a movie in the cinema alone. Not to say that I was alone in the a large cinema, I mean that I went with no friends, or family, or acquaintances. 

I’ve been curious about Wonder since the trailers were released. One, because of Julia Roberts. Two, because I called in the idea: “Oh this is gonna make me cry. I can feel it.” 

Both of that were justified. I might read the book soon when I get the chance.

I’ll be honest, it was a breath of fresh air to watch a film wherein children were involved in such intense atmosphere. I say intense because really, discrimination takes up a lot of the world’s thoughts. 

We see someone who isn’t like us and we immediately think that they can’t be with us. We see someone living a different type of life and we immediately think that they have no right to exist in ours.

That’s not right. And watching Wonder helped me realise just how much these concerns are so present that not many are taking the time to address it.

More importantly, not many people take the time to know what’s going on.

To this, it brought on a concept in my head. It may stay with me for a while. What’s it like to have a friend? More importantly, what’s it like to be a friend?

If we’re looking at this in one of the simplest ways, Auggie was going through the exact same thing that very other kid goes through. He was starting out school, a foreign concept to every kid. He was afraid of not being liked by others because he knew they were different. With that, he felt different, which, let me just say, is something even adults struggle with now.

And what was his best achievement? I feel that it wasn’t the self-recognition of being himself. It was that, after feeling isolated from a world he could never avoid, that he finally had people around him that could make him feel at home. Everywhere he went.

“It’s not enough to be friendly. You have to be a friend.”

Now this is definitely one of the most quotable quotes I have ever heard. It embodies so much the perception that being friendly can be, or is, a completely different concept from being a friend.

Yes we all pay attention to the norm of not being rude to others. We take into account what we say, how we approach people, etc. But when it comes down to it, when that person mentions that we were never really a friend, it makes us question what it really takes to earn the title.

We can think of someone as a friend, but do they think of us in the same way?

What is it that makes someone a friend? 

Is there a criteria we’re missing here? Are there instructions on how to approach these situations? I wouldn’t know. Meeting and making friends is as much of a mystery to me.

And let’s be honest, we lose some ‘best friends’ as well. It may be because of palpable differences, or a change in life’s directions. Sometimes, one or the other decides to just cut everything off. The reasons behind it? One may never know. 

How long have you been best friends with your best friend? I’ve personally known mine since the year 2000. You never really hit it off with anyone until you get to know them, or when they get to know you. 

I guess that’s one thing we can take into account. Earning and being a friend takes a mutual understanding. One has to be willing to spend time with you as much as you are with him or her. 

Let me just say that ending this post wasn’t easy. I had to dig deep into my head and think of that I wanted to say until I didn’t know what I wanted to say. So allow me to just tell you that you should always treasure the friendship that comes your way. 

Like Isabel told her son: “It’s not enough to be friendly. You have to be a friend.” So be a friend.

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