Words from an Androgynous Woman21:30
First off, can I really call myself a woman? I mean, with all the child-like things I do and all the fandoms that I drown myself into, I am clearly the most lady-like woman out there.
We're getting off-topic here. *laughs
So just recently, my boss was questioning my sexuality. He thought I was a lesbian.
I'm not saying that I don't like the orientation, but I knew for a fact that I wasn't one.
This got me thinking, what made him think that way about me?
Looking back, I think he took my actions as hints. Not to mention the banters I got into with some coworkers which, if I may add, I laugh about.
I think it started with when I decided to get a pixie cut after growing my hair up to below my shoulders. It wasn't the first time I had my hair that short, having had a pixie cut maintained for three years during my time in college.
Then I had it cut shorter before the company's outing to Tokyo last November 2016. Welp.
Later on, my coworkers started joking about a former intern who came out to the company as bisexual. They teased me on saying that we were probably seeing each other, et cetera, et cetera. So like the professional employee, I brushed it off.
I know myself too well to admit that I like dicks over chicks.
It actually doesn't stop there. I've been told many times of my uncanny ability to look like a man. Sometimes though, it goes out of hand when fast food workers mistake me for a sir and not a ma'am. I got used to it, and it's funny that they look down and notice their mistake. I'd be wearing a t-shirt and shorts when those things usually happen. It made me laugh in my head thinking that I was probably parading my genitalia to prove that I was a girl. *laughs
Honestly speaking, I never really took it as something to degrade or question myself of my sexual orientation. It makes me feel more confident. I mean, think of all the pranks I could pull.
This androgyny also influenced my style greatly. I sometimes wear outfits that are daring for some if not most women, to the point that I really do resemble a man. But I deal with it, I've gotten a lot of thumb's ups from dressing the way I want. That's all I need.
But of course, this confidence has to be balanced out with a little uncertainty. I still get the minor irritation of people always mistaking my sexuality and gender. And truth be told, I also tend to act rather masculine compared to my close girl friends.
My hair has now grown a good two to three inches longer since my last haircut. I still very much resemble a man with it, and go from wearing dresses to chino shorts whenever I feel like it. All this while parading my weird excuse of a chest and oh-so hairy legs.
I also had a suit tailored for myself to wear to our office Christmas party last year. I nailed every aspect of it.
I know myself well. It keeps me from being someone I'm not, and directs me towards the person I want to be: Beautiful.